13.6.12

my fingertips are holding on to the cracks in the foundation.

i went to visit a partner food bank last week and during the distribution there was:
room for secret smiles.
peeling back the icky parts.
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i also met my family. i imagine we'll get on, incrementally.
this is my youngest brother.
and this is another brother who doles out ice cream faced swats at the camera.
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an unmissed connection.

we met in cheap green fabric on two days' worth of rusty brown metal folding chairs and i remember where you live(d?), but don't recall your name.  i took your hand and we skipped the length of an empty outdoor mall in the middle of the night.  you looked so happy and i felt insouciant.  the stale piss in your toilet diminished everything else clean.  i chose sleep over you.  i woke up to you ironing crisp lines in a white cotton shirt.  i had cheap t-mobile excuses and you advised lots of liquids because you were an emt once and so sure i'd feel better soon.

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